Friday, December 6, 2013

Two Jokes, some medical content.

Good Morning all,

“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” – E. E. Cummings

Today we have two jokes intended to raise the spirits of the growing number of Stem Cell and Bone Marrow transplantees who are following this blog. Here is a jpeg you can save and stick onto your email or use as an avatar.

Humor is reputed to be the best medicine.  

 Below the jump there are links to the Mayo Clinic and WebMD and to  a site that will send you the joke(s) of the day.  

Caution: Jokes may cause nasal coffee spew, you have been warned.

So follow us over the jump, already...

not even a  proper soundtrack today, just this 15 seconds of canned laughter.

Cancer Treatment Centers of America  has a nice explanation of Laughter Therapy, as does this site.

The Mayo Clinic has this page with links under "stress relief"

WebMD  has an article entitled  Give Your Body a Boost with Laughter .  The author interviewed  one  Steve Wilson, MA, CSP, a psychologist and laugh therapist, 
and the author of " Laughter: A Scientific Investigation" ,  Robert R. Provine , who says:

  "I don't mean to sound like a curmudgeon," says Provine, "but the evidence that laughter has health benefits is iffy at best."

Drawing upon ten years of research into this most common-yet complex and often puzzling-human phenomenon, Dr. Robert Provine, the world's leading scientific expert on laughter, investigates such aspects of his subject as its evolution, its role in social relationships, its contagiousness, its neural mechanisms, and its health benefits. This is an erudite, wide-ranging, witty, and long-overdue exploration of a frequently surprising subject. 

Has anyone ever really died laughing?

source- the Amazon review

Get the book here

And of course, you can do a little scientific research yourself by getting  A Joke a Day  in your inbox.

There are other services, this one is pretty tame.

OK, enough yackin',  here are two from my Joke Collection;


     Several centuries ago, the Pope decreed that all Jews had to convert to Catholicism or leave Italy. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal: he'd have a religious debate with their leader. If the Jews won, they could stay in Italy; if the Pope won, they'd have to convert or leave.

     The Jewish people met and picked an aged and wise Rabbi to represent them in the debate. However, as the Rabbi spoke no Italian, and the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they agreed that it would be a 'silent' debate. On the chosen day the Pope and Rabbi sat opposite each other.

     The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. The Rabbi looked back and raised one finger. Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. The Rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. The Rabbi pulled out an apple. With that, the Pope stood up and declared himself beaten and said that the Rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay in Italy.

     Later the cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened. The Pope said,

"First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up a single finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our faiths. 

Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. The Rabbi responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us.

  Then I pulled out the wine and host to show that through the perfect sacrifice Jesus has atoned for our sins, but the Rabbi pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He bested me at every move and I could not continue."

     Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the Rabbi how he'd won.

 "I haven't a clue," said the Rabbi. "First, he tells me that we have three days to get out of Italy, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that the whole country would be cleared of Jews but I told him emphatically that we were staying right here."

" And then what?" asked a woman.

"Who knows?" said the Rabbi.   "He took out his lunch, so I took out mine."


A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store.

The store clerk called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor.

The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had
emergency open heart bypass surgery.

He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at
the Catholic Hospital.

 A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with
several forms, and a pen.

 She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment.

 Do you have health insurance?" she asked.

 He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance."

 The nun asked, "Do you have money in the bank?"

  He replied, "No money in the bank."

 Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?", asked
the irritated nun.

 He said, "I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun."

 The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not
spinsters!   Nuns are married to God."

 The patient replied, "Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law."



  1. Hahaha...glad I wasn't drinking coffee!

  2. I was drinking coffee and now must do a load of laundry--including upholstery! :-) you crack me up, Chris, and you know I love those 'theological' jokes!